Kiss, Kill, Karma
by Goddess Of Heather
Summary: The crew needs saving and Harper obliges with the help of a friend. NOT, I repeat not a Mary Sue


Title: Kiss, Kill, Karma

Summary:  The crew needs saving and Harper obliges with the help of a friend.  NOT, I repeat not a Mary Sue

Rating: PG-13

Setting: Season 2 Tyr hasn't turned yet

Prison was surprisingly mind numbing.  No gratuitous violence, no questions, and there wasn't even anything to complain about.  The cell was surprisingly dry, well lit and bunks had been provided for all.  The Nietcheans that had them were polite but on guard.  There was no chance of escape and insulting, smarmy comments had quickly worn off when there was no reaction.  "Tyr_"

"No."

Dylan looked insulted, "you didn't even let me finish."

"You were going to ask if knew why we were captured by the Tiger Pride, and the answer is the same as all the other times you have asked, whish is no!"  Tyr growled slightly in the last word, showing exactly how irritated he was.  Wait, what was that scent?  It was intoxicating, the essence of a true Alpha female Nietchean.  Suddenly a vision of lovely Nietchean perfection.  Flowing golden hair with two braids done on the sides to keep it out of the way, function and very, very Nietchean.  Her full melodious voice flowed over them.

"Shhh.  I'm with Harper.  We're here to get you out."  Then she bent over pulling two thin pieces of plast-steel from her hair and deftly began picking the picking the lock.  She stood up and swung the door open and began passing out weapons from various unlikely places like her hair, boots and inner thigh.  Tyr's eyes widen in surprise when she pulled a force lance from between her breasts in her bodice.  It was so skin tight he could not convince of how she hid the lump.  "Follow me.  Harper is keeping the computers busy."  Tyr followed closely behind her watching her muscular arms moving beneath the leather of the shirt.  She could bear many Alpha children, Tyr hoped to sway her to bear his.  He leaned forward and inhaled deeply.

She spun, her blue eyes blazing, "kindly restrain yourself from *sniffing*," she elongated the word making it almost a hiss, "me until we're actually safe!"  The derision in her voice showed exactly how much she appreciated his sudden behavior, which wasn't much.  The Eureka Mara was in sight when shots rang out around them.  "Why can't it ever go smooth?"  She crouched and sprung in a smooth motion firing on the group of Tigers behind them.  "Quickly get on the ship before they cut us off!"  Dylan and Tyr Began firing force lances while Beka ran ahead to open the door.  In a staggered firing pattern they retreated to the ship, "quickly Beka power up!"

Looking shocked and more than a bit angry she yelled back, "What about Harper?  We can't just leave him."

"He's already on board now can we go?"

Beka blinked and then faulted into the pilot's chair.  Tyr came up behind the blonde Nietchean, "you are a most formidable warrior.  Your skills are greatly varied.  You could birth many great Alphas.  My children."

Beka growled deep in her throat, "could you stop being so distracting?  I am trying to escape into slipstream."

Tyr barley spared her a glance, "you are not the pilot that I thought you were if something this small distracts you so."

Dylan came up behind Tyr, "I'm more distracted by the fact that I can't find Harper."  He pulled his force lance pointing it at the woman, "who are you and what have you done with Harper?"

Her hands went up defensively, "Whoa slow down there big guy.  There's a simple explanation for all of this."  Dylan raised an inquiring eyebrow, especially when she pulled out a spray bottle and squirted some around her hair line.  Then reaching up she pulled off her hair-- a wig to reveal short blonde hair.  Then reaching around her neck starting to undo her choker said, "I am," she finished undoing the clasp and pulled the necklace away, her voice deeping and turning very familiar, "Harper."

Tyr in complete shock actually stuttered, "W-what?  How?  Why?"

Harper now started stripping off more and more, like removing fake boobs, and the bone blades, "It's true.  As to why, well I needed to get into the base undetected.  This was the best way, as to being a woman, well I'm way too short to a Neitchean male, particularly if I want to past as an Alpha.  I've been working on this for awhile, just in case, since we have so many problems with Neits.  It's pretty ingenious if I do say so myself, which I do.  I mixed the pheromone/hormone scent of a Nietchean female in the lab after analyzing the sweat samples of several so I wouldn't smell like a particular one--" seeing the questioning look in Tyr's eyes "don't ask.  Then I mixed it with a scentless chemical that causes it to volatilize faster than human sweat making sure that it doesn't mix."  Harper turned the necklace and showed a small device attached to the inside of the necklace.  "This gave my voice that special female tone.  And those fake boobs are quite handy for hiding things in."  He tossed one to Dylan and the other to Tyr.  "They have grenades in them if we had got into any serious trouble.  And Tyr, I really don't think that I'll be able to bear your children anytime soon.  Sorry."  There was a smirk on Harper's face that promised that Tyr would not be hearing the last of his overture.


End file.
